To My Superhero

It's been a month since Mom went to be with the Lord. 30 days to be exact.

I miss her a lot and it's hitting me slowly. I think it's because Mom only came back home during the weekends and during the 3-4 months when she became quite weak, she hadn't come back at all.

I decided to take a day off today and pay a visit to her niche at All Saints Memorial Hall. Picked Jenny up at Eunos MRT Station after her work and went together. The PA system in the hall was playing "Amazing Grace" when we reached - one of Mom's favourite songs. We arranged her flowers (only fake ones allowed), spoke little and had our own silent moments even though we were together. Then I whipped out my iPad and iPod and we went through the family photos I store inside. Some were really funny and we laughed together. We stayed for about an hour... time went by quite quickly.

I realised that I spend more time with my sisters now. David is busy with the stall so I guess it's not as easy for him to join in any outings. Mom is always on our lips whenever we meet. We'll talk about what she would do in certain situations, what she used to do, her last moments. Right after the funeral, we immediately started looking at everyone's birthdays - one of the ways we could meet up as a family.

I miss you, Mommy. I miss holding this pair of hands and placing them on my face, and kissing them. Thank you for holding my hands for all my 39 years. Thank you for all those late nights where you stayed up to make/mend my school uniforms, performance costumes. You were such an incredibly creative and hardworking person. Not having gone to school was never an excuse you would use but instead, you did such a good job at making things happen for me. I could do so much because you have been supporting me all these while.

Thank you, Mommy. I love you... You know you are (still) the wind beneath my wings, and you are still my superhero!