Abandoned But Not Dysfunctional
I meant to write this earlier...I thought after the almost hit-and-run supper last night I might be able to get home to catch another episode of some criminal drama. But it turns out... channel 5 was broadcasting a game of soccer. *Yawn* My plan to post some thoughts during commercial breaks was further thwarted because my poor cyber connection made the hourglass tip to the next day. Ok, nevermind, no big deal. Just that by the time it's decently connected, I was probably on halfway's journey toward Lalaland...
Ya ya...I've been whining about my internet connection a lot lately but I can't find my LAN cable to attempt rectifying the problem. Don't even know how or if that'll solve the problem. I'm probably HARPING on this more than whatever has befallen me. And on that I have discovered something about myself...
At this moment, I feel quite satisfied about how I've turned out in certain aspect of my life. I did a small semi-conscious experiment on myself. Something just happened recently which got me really disappointed and sad (you can get a bit of a background from my previous post). I tried to turn to emoistic (if there's such a word) thinking to prolong the 'misery'. But lo and behold (ahaha), it was going nowhere. I realised that my thinking pattern has changed, probably over the past few months. Somehow logical perceptivity just kept steering me away from self-destructive and once-paralyzing behaviour of self-pity. The process to this point has been heart-wrenching, but I feel that I'm finally reaping its fruit. What's amazing is that I didn't fall to the other extreme of total detachment. I didn't think indifference or apathy is the way to go. Love is still in the air, wahaha! And for this I have a couple of friends to thank, one above and the other on earth, whose path He's made to cross with mine.
On the side...I'm getting a new old laptop in 1.5 months' time. Yipee! So looking forward to it!
Ya ya...I've been whining about my internet connection a lot lately but I can't find my LAN cable to attempt rectifying the problem. Don't even know how or if that'll solve the problem. I'm probably HARPING on this more than whatever has befallen me. And on that I have discovered something about myself...
At this moment, I feel quite satisfied about how I've turned out in certain aspect of my life. I did a small semi-conscious experiment on myself. Something just happened recently which got me really disappointed and sad (you can get a bit of a background from my previous post). I tried to turn to emoistic (if there's such a word) thinking to prolong the 'misery'. But lo and behold (ahaha), it was going nowhere. I realised that my thinking pattern has changed, probably over the past few months. Somehow logical perceptivity just kept steering me away from self-destructive and once-paralyzing behaviour of self-pity. The process to this point has been heart-wrenching, but I feel that I'm finally reaping its fruit. What's amazing is that I didn't fall to the other extreme of total detachment. I didn't think indifference or apathy is the way to go. Love is still in the air, wahaha! And for this I have a couple of friends to thank, one above and the other on earth, whose path He's made to cross with mine.
On the side...I'm getting a new old laptop in 1.5 months' time. Yipee! So looking forward to it!
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