To Love Is To Be Vulnerable
You know how it's like when you thought you were being helpful and caring and you did something for somebody, only to find that not only were you not appreciated, you even got a door slammed to your face?
I remembered a conference trip to Sydney with a group of friends years ago. Being there for the first time, everything was new to me - the experience, the company, the purpose. One of our stops landed us in a place of interest and I came across a stack of colourful postcards on a festival that were free to take. So I took a few for myself and my friends as a souvenir. One of them was probably in a foul mood, cos he not only rejected it but made sure I knew that he couldn't care less about it. I was a bit upset then and complained that he should be more appreciative. And to that, he said, "I didn't ask you to do it what!" That really hurt.
Well, thanks to God (and to that 'friend', after I was able to recover from it), I've learnt that when we initiate acts of kindness, the truth is that these acts are uninvited. We can't blame people for saying something like "I didn't ask you to do it what". Take these experiences as a test to our intentions then. Are we being kind so that we can be appreciated? Or are we simply acting out of our love and concern for the other person?
Having said that, I believe that we need to be appreciative to people who care for us, and we need to show it, too. It's true that we may not have asked for it, but perhaps thinking from another angle, we could at least try to reinforce gestures of thoughtfulness. There are enough selfishness and self-centredness in this world already.
Moreover, to not appreciate something is to take it for granted. There will come a time when we will need acts of kindness along our lives' journeys. If we have the thinking that, "no thanks, I can manage, I don't need your help, go help somebody else", then believe me, we will be put in a situation where we would wish we hadn't been that conceited.
If we aim to love as God has commanded, perhaps we could overlook the uninvited kindness and show some appreciation to the people who have us in their hearts. Or is the wall around our heart too thick to be touched by any acts of kindness anymore?
I pray that God will give me His strength to continue loving. May I love like I've never been hurt. Although it's true that the incident with that friend contributed to a certain aspect of my growth towards maturity, I'd rather not be the friend who cause another friend to grow in that way.
Then He (Jesus) said to the disciples, “It is impossible that no offenses should come, but woe to him through whom they do come!" (Luke 17:1)
So similarly, we should learn to take note that our comments do not offend the target of our reproof. Not that we should compromise the truth, but I'm sure we could work on the way it is conveyed. Such considerations reflects our intentions. I've been reminded recently, too, that our job is to love and correct in love. To change another person is God's prerogative and He will do it in His perfect timing. Remember that "a person may plant, another water, but God is the One who gives the increase".
I remembered a conference trip to Sydney with a group of friends years ago. Being there for the first time, everything was new to me - the experience, the company, the purpose. One of our stops landed us in a place of interest and I came across a stack of colourful postcards on a festival that were free to take. So I took a few for myself and my friends as a souvenir. One of them was probably in a foul mood, cos he not only rejected it but made sure I knew that he couldn't care less about it. I was a bit upset then and complained that he should be more appreciative. And to that, he said, "I didn't ask you to do it what!" That really hurt.
Well, thanks to God (and to that 'friend', after I was able to recover from it), I've learnt that when we initiate acts of kindness, the truth is that these acts are uninvited. We can't blame people for saying something like "I didn't ask you to do it what". Take these experiences as a test to our intentions then. Are we being kind so that we can be appreciated? Or are we simply acting out of our love and concern for the other person?
Having said that, I believe that we need to be appreciative to people who care for us, and we need to show it, too. It's true that we may not have asked for it, but perhaps thinking from another angle, we could at least try to reinforce gestures of thoughtfulness. There are enough selfishness and self-centredness in this world already.
Moreover, to not appreciate something is to take it for granted. There will come a time when we will need acts of kindness along our lives' journeys. If we have the thinking that, "no thanks, I can manage, I don't need your help, go help somebody else", then believe me, we will be put in a situation where we would wish we hadn't been that conceited.
If we aim to love as God has commanded, perhaps we could overlook the uninvited kindness and show some appreciation to the people who have us in their hearts. Or is the wall around our heart too thick to be touched by any acts of kindness anymore?
I pray that God will give me His strength to continue loving. May I love like I've never been hurt. Although it's true that the incident with that friend contributed to a certain aspect of my growth towards maturity, I'd rather not be the friend who cause another friend to grow in that way.
Then He (Jesus) said to the disciples, “It is impossible that no offenses should come, but woe to him through whom they do come!" (Luke 17:1)
So similarly, we should learn to take note that our comments do not offend the target of our reproof. Not that we should compromise the truth, but I'm sure we could work on the way it is conveyed. Such considerations reflects our intentions. I've been reminded recently, too, that our job is to love and correct in love. To change another person is God's prerogative and He will do it in His perfect timing. Remember that "a person may plant, another water, but God is the One who gives the increase".
